Cattle Run
Summary: A herd of energon-producing Turbosteer somehow appear on Arizona... and on the scene is a Pretender-powered Blueshift going toe-to-toe with Prime! Arizona The Grand Canyon state consists of terrain from the high desert plateau in the northern and eastern sections to the desert basins and jagged mountain ranges in the southern and western parts, broken only by the high, forested mountains in central Arizona. The spectacular Grand Canyon, for which the state is best known, displays its timeless beauty close to the border between Arizona and its northern neighbor, Utah. To the south are the major cities of Phoenix and Tucson, irrigation from the Colorado and Salt Rivers making them green oases in the southern desert. RUMMMMMMMBLE. RUMMMMMMMMMMMMBLE. RUMBBBBLLLLLLLLE. No, the ground in Arizona is not crying out for that red (or blue?!) Decepticon. It's not even checking if you are ready to watch a wrestling match. It is groaning in protest as hundreds and hundreds of tons of TURBOSTEER thunder across the badlands. Each Turbosteer is three times the size of an Earth steer; they were Cybertron's primary herd. But they haven't been seen in millenia upon millenia, not since the Golden Age! How did they get to Earth? Why are they stampeding across Arizona? And why, oh why, does everything their hooves touch turn to PURE ENERGON? A rumpled-looking news anchor in a badly outdated suit breaks in on the usual broadcast of The Surreal Life season 700. "This is Chester Day, reporting LIVE from the Arizona badlands. In what appears to be some sort of freak space warp event, a huge herd of what eyewitnesses describe as 'giant robot steers' has appeared and is stampeding straight for Phoenix!" Choppy video taken from a helicopter shows a large herd of Turbosteer doing just that. "And... what's this? We're finally seeing the end of the herd here... an OH MY GOD! Oh my GOD! EVERYTHING they run over... is turning into ENERGON!" Blueshift says, "Hmm Thunderwing? Have no fear, for I am the best Decepticon warrior!" Octane says, "No, I am the greatest Decepticon warrior, and everybody's gonna know it too!" Rodimus Prime transforms into a high-tech winnebago. Let's burn rubber! It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's... well, it's a space plane. Scattershot has arrived on the scene, powerful engines keeping his improbable starfighter mode aloft through sheer brute force. "Primus!" he swears, seeing the size of the herd. "How're we s'posed t'control THESE beasts? Ain't no one had t'deal with Turbosteers since th'Golden Age!" He flies lower, towards the side of the herd. A few of the turbosteers flinch away from his presence... but one Autobot alone isn't enough to steer THESE steer! "Well, here goes nothin'." "1... 2... 3... Go!" Rodimus Prime shouts, his vehicle form detaching from mag-clips along Scattershot's fuselage. Whether Scattershot knew the Autobot leader was there or not all along remains a mystery, but Rodimus Prime hits the ground with all six wheels spinning, kicking up a cloud of dust and fishtailing from side to side before he gains traction. "I'm glad I put on my off-road axles this morning," he mutters, driving up alongside the cyber-steer herd. "Wow, I always thought Kup was lying when he talked about these things. A real-live cybersteer!" Payloader is here in Arizona, several dozen kilometres outside of Phoenix. That the Constructicon is here while this strange incident is occuring is a complete coincidence. He's working on a secret project for the glory of Galvatron. It isn't often Scrapper gets a chance to put his alternate mode's disguise virtues to good use, as so far no fleshlings have come to bother him. Scrapper's shovel plows through the ground as he rumbles across the terrain, turning, pivoting, lifting, pushing, and otherwise molding the Earth to his desires. Scrapper is about half done working on a gigantic Decepticon Insignia that will be viewable from space with the naked optic. He planned on signing it and everything when the deep rumbling of the herd was heard. "What in the pit?" the payloader says with a mutter. Off in the distance he can even see the rumble of the dust cloud, though he can't make out what's making it. Dinobots on the rampage, perhaps? Wow, Scrapper muses, I haven't experienced a coincidence like this since Season 2. Caring little for the mysterious Robosteers and even less for the miserably human habitation designated 'Pheonix', this particular robot in disguise - Hook - is interested only in the Energon they have supposedly produced amidst the mesas and scrub of the Arizona badlands. His crane mode rattles along a dry, sandswept highway, matching the posted speed limit of 60 miles per hour. Not that Hook intends on obeying the law, but that's about as fast as he can drive. He sends out a quick shortwave transmission: "We're going to need a lot of Energon cubes for this, Scrapper. Any sign of Long Haul? I don't want to be the one to drag all those cubes back to base" It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's a big robot? Oh yeah, that's exactly what it is. It's GRIMLOCK and he is following Scattershot, flying in his robot mode. As Rodimus Prime detaches from Scattershot's underside, Grimlock transforms into a big robotic dinosaur and drops like a rock, crashing into the ground right in front of Romdomus Prime, leaving an impact crater. F-35, Marine Corps variant, transforms into robot form. Catechism's feet unfold, her arms unfold out of her body, her nosecone rotates through her body and ends up on her shoulders to expose her face, and her wings rotate into position. Breakdown is crusing..or perhaps racing..along the almost deserted roads out side of Phoenix, the sun glistining off of his sleek white paintjob. Ping from the same 'place.' His systems have entered into serious 'drift' over millions of years, he's loaded with uncustomized and 'gumby' parts from the prison, hasn't been maintened well and nobody understands how his systems work to fully work with them. But that's how I see him in his faction. Pardon the spam. F4U flies out to investigate, because, hey, free energon! There has to be some way to exploit this for the Decepticon's schemes. Maybe they can capture the cybersteers and use them to fuel their war machine. THOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! From the sky, responding at speed is the armoured form of Blueshift. But none of his sexy exterior today, no, today he is encased in the terrifying Octopoid armour, which raises its domed head and ROARS as it crashes down onto the ground, feet firmly apart, tentacles frothing at his sides. "Aaaaah, fresh prey!" he growls as he looks at the herd through an optical sensor replete with processed data from the shell. "In this armour, I feel like I could crush them ALL! Raargh!" He raises the suit's large trident above his head and cries again From Reptilian Armor , Octane also follows Blueshift, his engines pulsing with the attempt to keep up with or ideally push ahead of Blueshift's eight limbed armor suit, as he follows in his own lizard like battle suit. He's going so fast, in fact, and is so focused on trying to get into the lead that he doesn't decelerate in time as the ground rapidly approaches. Octane hits the ground, feet first, but hard enough to send up a cloud of dust several feet into the air before the wind clears it. The lizard like head shakes as Octane steps forward before snapping around at the sound of the stampeding cyber horses. "Mmm...pure Energon for the taking...I should take them all now..." "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" comes the mechanical lowing of the huge beasts. The parched earth cracks beneath their feet, turning a rich, glowing blue after they pass. Is this a freak accident of science? Or is it yet another of the lost marvels of Cybertron's Golden Age? The Turbosteers respond to the presence of the Autobots as a herd. There is a very slight shift in their trajectory in response to their presence... but nothing drastic. It's going to take more than that to move this stubborn mass of flesh. Flamin' Winnebago's wheels spin as he runs over some of the glowing blue cow-gold in the ground, threatening to cause the winnebago to spin out of control. "Woa-ah!" He turns his wheels one way, then the other, driving to regain control. Eventually he powers out of the energon-slick, but his sides are coated with glowing blue fluid. "Watch out for that energon trail," he shouts to his comrades, "Stuff's slippery!" Shifting gears, he accelerates along the side of the herd. "Scattershot, fly out ahead of the herd! See if you can use your ion cannon to blast a trench and stop the stampede!" Flamin' Winnebago also drives around Grimlock just in time!!! "I ain't gotta look out fer any energon trail, I'm flyin'!" comes Scattershot's flippant reply. Nonetheless, he dips his wing to acknowledge Rodimus' orders. "You got it, Rod." His engines flare as the afterburners kick in, shooting him to the head of the herd. The nose of his starship, which is also a gun, begins to glow. It's not long before Scattershot begins blasting a hole in the ground. "Err... this ain't the best tool fer diggin' trenches!" he calls. "I hope the humans don't mind if I gotta blow up summa their wilderness." Metal T-Rex frowns. "Ugh, Roddymess Prime, almost drive over me, Grimlock!" He waves his tiny, impotent fist in fury. "You need go driving school!" During his joyriding, breakdown just happens to notice the stunning red futuristic truck that is RODIMUS PRIME. Upon noticing the aforementioned autobot leader, Breakdown spins his wheel, turning and driving out into the desert to investigate. "What the heck are those.." He comes up behind the cyber cattle, and begins honking his horn "HONK HONK get outa the way!" Spotting the glare from Scattershot's cannon blasting a hole in the ground, Hook veers off the highway, and *bump*bump*bumps* along as he tries off-roading in his crane mode. The going is slow, and Hook decides that flying over the rough terrain in his robot mode is a better approach. He transforms, spitting grit out onto the ground. "I'm going to have dirt in my joints for cycles.." He groans. He flies over the rocky terrain, and lands on a mesa overlooking the herd of oversized robot steers... and the mysterious(and slightly trampled) trail of energon. "Long Haul fell down a hole again" Scrapper replies over the shortwave, "And I'm not letting him out again until he remembers he can fly!" The Constructicon CO is adament about this as he slows down, lifts his shovel, and dumps the dirt within elsewhere. The Decepticon design is pretty simple, made up of lots of deep grooves in the Earth. A chemical of Mixmaster's design keeps the ground nice and hard. "We should be alright on energon" he reassures his co-leader. "Hey do you hear something?" F4U hovers down to get a better look at what's going on here. It's utterly strange, really. Could there be something more sinister going on to cause this? The monsterous tentacled form of Blueshift-punch stands watching as the cattle storm past, leaving their golden trail behind them. "NNnyyaaa PRIIIIIIIME!" he roars, tentacles writhing at his sides as he sees the Autobot leader approach. The internal rockets in the suit roar into life, slowly raising him into the air, where he hovers above the herd. "Hear me Autobots, it has been decreed that today, you all DIE!" And with that, his tentacles scrunch in front of him, only to suddenly snap apart, shooting deadly flechettes in the direction of the Autobots present Octopoid Armor unleashes its area_melee attack on Scattershot and Rodimus Prime, striking Rodimus Prime and Scattershot. From Reptilian Armor , Octane looks up at Scattershot as he sees the other starting to bore a tunnel in the ground before he takes off, running at full tilt toward the Autobot spacecraft, as he starts shaking his fist at the other. "Hey, you stop that! That Energon is all mine and you're not going to stop me from taking it!" He closes in as fast as he can on Scattershot before leaping up with his powerful legs and trying to slam him out of the path of the herd. Reptilian Armor strikes The Last Star Fighter with Punch. Even though the trench is slow going and nowhere near complete, the loud EXPLOSIONS scare the turbosteers! Octoblueshift's missile assault only adds to the herd's panic as stray missiles fly into the stampede... blowing chunks of turbosteer all over the Arizona landscape. The turbosteers "MOOOOOO!!!" in confusion and veer away from the hole... and start heading straight towards Scrapper's construction project! OH NO! What will the Constructicon Commander do now? "ARGH!" Scattershot roars as he is missiled and tackled in his fragile space vehicle mode. The starfighter crashes to the ground under the weight of the Reptilian Armor, bending in ways that space jets are not meant to bend. While he is rolling in the dirty, he transforms. Once back on his feet, he turns a withering glower on the Decepticon attackers. Staggering slightly, he spares a glance at the Turbosteer herd and its new destination... and smiles. "Y'all ain't so TOUGH!" he roars, pulling out his rifle and aiming it towards the Reptilian One. RATTATAT-TAT it goes, coughing out those tiny spheres of painful acidic destruction. "Y'all ain't NOTHIN'!" Scattershot reconfigures into his humanoid robot form, hands flexing and feet stomping. His head ratchets into place, looking grim. Scattershot strikes Reptilian Armor with Automatic Acid-Pellet Rifle. Green Cyber-Copter 's auxiliary engines flare angrily as he streaks into the area, homing in easily on a couple of familiar Autobot IFF signals. He flies once over the area, then circles back, dropping down for a closer look at the Reptillian Armor. "Octane...is that you? Hey, no fair. How am I supposed to kick you around when you're in one of -those- things?!" He fires a few generic laser blasts at the armor, testing it's strength. Springer strikes Reptilian Armor with Laser. CRUNCH! Rodimus Prime gets flechette'd! The winnebago's hood is pierced by the horny projection, causing the vehicle to flip tail-end up in the air and then tumble end over end in the unforgiving Arizona soil. Rodimus Prime mitigates the damage, transforming and sliding in the dirt in a crouch, the crackling flechette buried in his chest. "Nrgh, figures," he mutters, reaching up to pull the flechette out of his armor with a wince. "Decepticons always show up when they're the *last* thing you want to see!" He raises one arm, the chrome barrels firing off a tri-partite stream of photonic energy, aiming for the Octopoid's face. "So this is the new Decepticon secret weapon, huh? Looks like a B-movie reject." Rodimus Prime strikes you with Photonic Blasters for 12 points of damage. Metal T-Rex jumps up and down, waving his arms in fury. "Hey! Hey! You no attack me friends! Roddymess Prime! No!" He opens his mouth wide and yells, "Stupid fishstick, me make you cook like microwave, or big wave. Like microwave but big, since me, Grimlock king and also big." And then he shoots fire out of his mouth. Metal T-Rex strikes you with fire for 3 points of damage. Streaking through the air with the roar of engines, the Technobot Strafe moves in closely behind Springer. The aircarjethoveraparatus veers fluidly through the air as he approaches, sighting his fellow Autobots... and those massive monstrosities that they're fighting. "O-oh Prancing P-Primus! Look at those th-things! They're ugly!! They're huge! This is b-bad!!" Strafe tilts downwards, carrying himself low to the ground with a sudden burst of speed, rapidly transforming in the process. "AAAAAAAAAH!! I'M GONNA D-D-D-DIIIIIEEEE!!" This battlecry is accompanied with the rapid firing of two massive heat rifles, spraying the ground around all the fighters, Autobot and Decepticon alike, liberally with a rain of heat pulses. "OH J-JESUS!!" Strafe strikes you with FREAKIN' OUT!!!! for 3 points of damage. Strafe unleashes his FREAKIN' OUT!!!! attack on Rodimus Prime, Grimlock, Scattershot, Octopoid Armor and Reptilian Armor , striking Scattershot, Grimlock and Octopoid Armor . Payloader shifts into robot mode, squints his optical visor, and brings up his hand up to shield himself from the sun's glare. He stares out at the approaching dust cloud. Finally, the Decepticon engineer realizes just what it is that's rushing towards his beautiful art. With his work at stake, Scrapper stands tall. "Hook, get me mah gun. We've got a herd on the way." he says dramatically. Realizing that he already has his gun, Scrapper pulls out his souped up laser pistol and charges the mini-energon cells in it. Scrapper steps forward, angles his right side towards the approaching herd, and aims at the approaching turbosteer. The moment they're in range, he cuts loose with a barrage of laserfire. Other Decepticons and Autobots are noted as well. They're going to be getting assistance just as soon as the herd is steered away from the giant insignia. "PRIIIIIIIIME!" The Octopoid suit roars, as it starts to stomp towards the Autobot leader, slowly as if wading, the tentacles coiled forwards to the attack. "You are MIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!" He weathers the other attacks, which sizzle on his armour. His sole focus now is on Rodimus, hands clenching and unclenching. "I TOLD YOU THAT I WOULD BE YOUR DEATH!" he roars, a goo-ish organic spittle slipping down the lips of the suit's mouth. Lifting the trident above his head, he hurls it at Prime, as if a Javelin. "Tonight, I dine on MATRIX!" You strike Rodimus Prime with FORK YOU. Scrapper says, "Someone refresh my memory on why we haven't sent Strafe a Decepticon application yet?" Dreadwind says, "Because we can't get close enough to give him the form." Arachnae says, "Do you want the rest of his kind to also apply?" Scrapper says, "Maybe we could email him some brochures or something." F4U Corsair Catechism says, "I can be equipped with cannisters for pamphlet delivery." Breakdown notices he's in the middle of the firefight, and skids to a hault behind the stampedeing Turbosteers, screechings his wheels and heading away from them. "Ahhh! Autobots!!!" Blueshift says, "Kill the Dinobot, Prime is MINE" Loser Catechism says, "Orders?" Dreadwind says, "We'll also be needing someone to take over Blueshift's duties." Scrapper says, "Ahhh. Slag, I guess I'm in command here, aren't I? Alright, team, beat up all the Autobots. Let Blueshift serve as a distraction for Prime while we kill all the others." Scrapper says, "And once Prime is done bludgeoning Blueshift's bloodied body, we'll gang up on him." Loser Catechism says, "How did blood get inside Blueshift? Shouldn't he have that checked?" Scrapper says, "Robo blood, Catechism." Hook can see Blunderwing's two biological armors below, anfrom his scans, he has a pretty good idea of just how tough they are. Content to allow both Blueshit and Octane to use the new technology to rip the Autobots apart, Hook instead swoops down from his mesa and begins collecting some cubes of Energon from the ground. On the previously trampled path of the robotsteers, Hook hopes to avoid detection by the Autobots while he briefly tests the quality of the Energon produced by the metal cows. From Reptilian Armor , Octane snarls as he feels the acid corroding it's way through his armor, backing away from Scattershot. as he fixes his optics on the Autobot in front of him as the substance finally drips off him onto the ground. "I've got nothing, huh? Well, you've got it all wrong! I've got more then you've got and I'm gonna show ya why!" He runs at Scattershot before jumping forward, engines cutting in, as he flies toward Scattershot with both feet extended. Reptilian Armor misses Scattershot with its Kick attack. F4U flies off in the direction of the Autobots, since hey, she has orders. Lime green orders. Hmm, all these Autobots seem pretty tough, and Starfe needs pamphlets. Or something. Catechism's a bit out of it, as usual. Lacking a better idea, she flies in the general direction of Springer. Ping ping ping. A few of Strafe's shots bounce off of Grimlock, leaving scuff marks but apparently doing little damage. "Ow! Stupid Technobot, watch what doing! You hitted me, Grimlock!" He frowns and thinks deeply, ignoring the chaos around him. "Me think we need better strategy! Roddymess Prime, why you not get Autobots under control? We need attack plan! Split forces! Some us attack stupid 'cons, some of us street stupid cows! Me no care if fishstick hit you, be leader already!" Green Cyber-Copter finishes his attack run and pulls up, noticing his attacks have no apparent affect on Octane's new armor. "This is gonna be fun." Springer drawls. Then he decides to shift to Blueshift, since some of the other Autobots are already concentrating on that armor. Springer transforms while still high in the air, flipping over once and falling to land close to Rodimus, standing shoulder to shoulder with his old comrade in arms...and then an instant later Rodimus disappears as he gets skewered and flies back. Springer grimaces, before producing a large rifle and opening fire at full power. Springer strikes you with high-powered barrage for 7 points of damage. "S-s-sorry!!" Comes Strafe's nervous, jittery reply to Grimlock as he lands in a staggering crouch, heat rifles still pulsing with life. "I-I guess I did pretty good-- AAAAAAAAAAH!!" Strafe suddenly lets out a surprised YELP as he sees the massive reptilian beast charging just past him and straight for Scattershot. "O-oh no you don't! EAT H-H-HEAT!" Strafe's right arm swings wildly, and he doesn't even bother to look as he squeezes the trigger of his weapon. A concentrated BEAM of heat sears forward, slicing through the air. Yet, it completely misses it's mark: instead of hitting Octane and his Shell, it blazes straight upwards, on a path towards Catechism in a moment of sheer, freak luck. "Y-YEAH!! EAT SLAG R-REPTILE!" Strafe's still not looking. Strafe strikes F4U with Heat Rifle ::Maximum Output::. Rodimus Prime takes the trident in the stomach, flying back to the ground with a heavy thud and twisting in the dirt in pain. "Nnnrgh!" He grunts, clutching the trident as it crackles with electrical sparks from his pierced abdomen. "You're not exactly HELPING, Grimlock!" He calls back in frustration, his hand sliding up into his wrist and transforming into a buzzsaw. The blade spins up with a high-pitched whine as he slashes at the trident it in his stomach, cutting it half. Standing up, he glances around, the turbosteer herd spreading all around him a wild stampede. Reaching into his hip compartment, Rodimus pulls out his grapple line, quickly fashioning a lasso which he throws around the neck of one of the steer. Tugging on it, he attempts to guide the steer's rampage right into the Octopoid Pretender! "Trust me, pal, you aren't the first guy to tell me that!" Rodimus Prime strikes you with Turbosteer Crash for 19 points of damage. There is a pitiful lowing as Scrapper's gun begins to rip into the Turbosteer herd, destroying the front line of robotic cows. But there are just so many of them! More and more of them stampede, veering off course again... back towards Phoenix! Scattershot growls low in his throat, deflecting the incoming lizard kick with his undamaged arm. Stepping into the attack, he uses a move that worked pretty well on Scourge the other night. That's right, he slams his head into the squishy organic monster. "I'll show ya why I'M th'freakin' Technobot Commander, and YER just an oozin' CHUMP!" Scattershot strikes Reptilian Armor with HEADBUTT. From Reptilian Armor , Octane pays no attention whatsoever to Springer, his attacks on him, or his attacks on Blueshift. Octane is focused entirely on Scattershot as he flies past Scattershot, adjusting the thrust of his engines to put him back down on the ground, before he turns around just in time to have Scattershot's head knocked into his and causing him to stumble backward. He doesn't seem too hurt but he does seem angerier as he looks up, a new dent decorating his armored head, before he pulls out his own weapon and levels it at Scattershot. "You want to talk about ooze? I'm gonna turn you into ooze!" Reptilian Armor misses Scattershot with its Flamethrower attack. F4U transforms. She was really badly busted up by that shot, but she's taking it like a toughie. The Seeker cracks her knuckles and comments, "I was just going to deliver pamphlets, Strafe, but I guess I'll have to bring the pain instead." She dives in, attempting to backhand Strafe across his face. Catechism, conincidentally, also extends her spiked knuckles. Catechism misses Strafe with its Spiked Knuckles attack. Blaster says, "Soundwave - quick, I just need one more word! 7 letters long, starts with an E, third letter is G. The clue is 'Overly scientific one (taunt).'" Scrapper has gotten rid of the turbosteer threatening the trenches and sent them careening towards the city. A job well done for the Constructicon. The engineer therefore turns his attention towards the Autobots. Lets see... Rodimus? Uh, no. Scattershot? Mmmmmno. Grimlock? Hahahahaha-no. Strafe? Scrapper would go for the Technobot were he not at the edge of his pistol's range. Hesitating as he considers which is the least dangerous Autobot betweenthe three killbeasts, Scrapper finally decides to help out Octane by trying to snipe him. "Find anything out about the energon?" he radios Hook. Scrapper strikes Scattershot with Laser Pistol - Low Setting. Breakdown suddenly see's the Turbosteers coming up beside him and gives them some room, honking his horn to keep them at a safe distance. "Primus Blessed things! Get away, Get away!" Dirt and debries are bouncing off his car form with audible clangs and clinks, making him wish he hadn't gotten off the road in the first place. Nevermind the Turbosteers.. "NYAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" is about all Blueshiftpunch can muster as Prime smashes him back, causing cracks and ripples across the armour. "Nnn I am BLUESHIFT, your GREATEST enemy!" he roars. "Prostrate yourself before me! We Decepticons own the sea!" (He points at himself) "The land!" (at this, he points at Scrapper) "...and the air!" He finishes by pointing at Catechism. "We will take this precious energon and forge a new Cybertron!" The tentacles on his suit surge forwards, aiming to knock Prime back You strike Rodimus Prime with Octo-CRUSH!. Hook rises from his kneeling position, and scowls at the muddy energon coating the ground. He stows away his testing equipment, and sends a messege out to all Decepticons about the Energon being produced by the steers. The turbosteers flinch from Breakdown's honking horn, but are much larger than the car. They don't seem to respond to just one stimulus! Their stampede towards Phoenix continues unchecked... for now! Hook says, "The energon being produced by these... turbocows, or whatever they're called, is very degraded and diluted." Scrapper says, "Is it worth mining, Hook?" Hook says, "It would be useless for anyone, except perhaps Blot." Loser Catechism says, "So we should set it on fire, right?" Scrapper says, "Hmph. Probably for the best since the Autobots probably have the upper hand here." Scrapper says, "I approve of any burning that needs doing." Hook says, "I reccomend testing it's combustibility.. on a large scale." Metal T-Rex sighs and rolls his eyes. "FINE. Me take care of things. You, Strafe, get stupid head over here. Stop making mess. You go cows. You get in front of cows, you do you random shooting and steer cows away from city. Scattershot killing Constructicons is fine, Spranger, you get over here, and help me Grimlock deal with dumb lizard thing. Me think Roddymess can handle fishstick." "Wha--h-hey, where did the reptile thing go...?" Strafe is left to stare in confusion as he looks all around him, only to find a swiftly approaching Decepticon Jet. Behind his blue visor, the Technobot blinks, and squints. "Wh-what? Pamphlets? What are you t-talking about? ... oh god. You have pamphlets about my t-tech specs don't you?! You're g-gonna use it against me?! Oh N-N-NO, I'm the target of a Decepticon P-PLOT!!" So busy is Strafe fretting about the potential of a conspiracy against him, he doesn't even notice Catechism's sudden assault, conveniently twitching to the side and letting knuckles swipe nothing but air. "Well I W-WON'T LET YOU! GET AWAY FROM ME T-TECHNO-H-H-HAG!" At this, Strafe suddenly springs backwards to get -away- from Catechism, firing a few low-powered rounds of heat pulses at the Decepticon Jet as he does. "GAAAAAAAAH!" Strafe misses Catechism with his Heat Rifle ::Low Output:: attack. Metal T-Rex covers his eyes with his tiny hands. "FINE. You all dumbs!" He crosses his arms in front of his chest. "ME take care of cows." He transforms into robot mode, flies over where the cows are, and plants himself right in front of them. He waves his head back and forth making a wall of fire in front of the cows. "TURN, DUMB COWS." Scattershot laughs in the face of danger. Or, in this case, ridiculously powerful Decepticon weapons. "Haw!" he exclaims, just as Scrapper's laser PINGs off his back, taking a chunk of shoulder armor with it. "Aw!" he exclaims, looking down at the wound with dismay. The Technobot looks over at Grimlock and nods. "Whatever ya say, Grimlock!" he calls, before turning and sprinting towards Scrapper. "T'day's yer unlucky day, Constructinerd!" Scattershot shouts, raising his arms and firing several rounds out of his wrist blasters. "Too bad Gobot ain't here ta thrash ya again, so I'll jus' have t'do it MYSELF!" Scattershot strikes Scrapper with Wrist Blasters. Springer shouts, "Rodimus!" He reaches behind his back and pulls out his sword. "Grimlock...no more messing around, we've got to get in there and take this thing out!" He runs a few steps before launching himself in a flying leap, sword raised behind him as he arcs gracefully through the air in one of his best action-movie stunt attacks. Springer strikes you with Spartan Fury for 10 points of damage. Assault Beast has been crouched and waiting, patiently for the rampaging steers to draw close to his location. A beastly gleam in his optics. His claws scrape earthy rock as he tenses.. Tenses... The thunderous rush draws closer, the mass of running electro-prey in the distance. A throaty anticipatory rumble as they approach... "Blueshift--?" Rodimus Prime doesn't have much time to look confused before he is thoroughly tentacle whipped, each powerful, slimey limb battering the Autobot leader from side to side like a rag doll. "Good..." CLANG. "Idea..." CLANG. "Springer!" Rodimus finishes calling back, just as the last tentacle strikes his chin and sends him flying through the air, striking the ground and flipping head over heels in the dust. Wincing, he pushes himself up for one arm, pulling out his Autobot standard sidearm from his hip pocket and squeezing off a few laser blasts at the Octopoid armor. He looks to the side, watching Grimlock try to cut off the stampede, "Keep it up, Grimlock! Don't let those turbosteer trample Phoenix!" Rodimus Prime strikes you with Standard-Issue Autobot Laser Pistol for 1 points of damage. Hook says, "... This isn't even Energon at all! It's /waste/" Arachnae says, "And you tasted it? Ew." Hook says, "No, I /tested/ it." Dreadwind says, "It's all a waste." Hook says, "Stand clear of the steers and their waste byproducts. I'm torching it." Thunderwing says, "No!" Thunderwing says, "How -dare- you risk my shells!" Hook says, "That's why I'm telling them to stand clear." Hook says, "It's Blueshift who's risking your shell fighting Rodimus Prime, not me." Blueshift says, "You... nnnn.... need to make them stronger Thunderwing! It can not take down Prime" From Reptilian Armor , Octane turns to look upward at Springer, the sight of the green Autobot suddenly being recalled to him, as he launches himself at Springer himself before doing a flying tackle toward the Autobot triplechanger. Reptilian Armor misses Springer with its Mighty Tackle attack. Dreadwind says, "I said that they were utterly pointless, not that anyone ever listens." Thunderwing says, "Nnn. Your incompetence is skewing the battle data recorder's readings, Blueshift." Scrapper stares back at Scattershot. He didn't need that reminder of Gobot and . The Constructicon had actually been in a fantastic mood ever since he was restored back to his Constructicon self. Steeling himself up for a battle against Scattershot (with Octane's help), Scrapper retorts, "Bring it on!" Then the blasters hammer into him, leaving a pair of deep gouges in his hard Constructicon armour. Scrapper almost falls onto his tushie from the impact. "Son of a..." while Octane struggles valiantly against the Technobot, Scrapper returns fire with a single high powered blast. Scrapper strikes Scattershot with Laser Pistol - Maximum Setting. Catechism blinks and she nets nothing but nothing. Hag? What, does she cackle over a boiling cauldron in her spare time? She pulls back, out of the way of his shot, and since he seems to be flailing over this, she agrees chirpily, "That's right, Strafe! We're going to show everyone your tech specs! Children in Africa will know your every weakness and make fun of you on the playground." Since she has fallen back somewhat, she then tries to crack a whip at him. Catechism misses Strafe with its Electrified Whip attack. Octane says, "This suit of yours hasn't been any use at all, Thunderwing! Where did you construct this with, second hand automaton parts?" Blueshift says, "That is because you try to attack the really fast Autobots. You are a big reptile thing. Go CRUSH the slow ones, idiot!" Scrapper says, "Wait, don't leave me alone with Scattershot!" Octane says, "Oh, -I'm- the idiot? I didn't start attacking Rodimus Prime!" Blueshift says, "Well SOMEONE had to attack Rodimus Prime!" Octane says, "Oh, and that's you? It'll take more then that squiggly armed suit of yours to make you tough!" Thunderwing says, "That is it. Neither of you is EVER touching a Pretender Shell -again- after this." Loser Catechism says, "Can I touch one?" Upon further testing, Hook shakes his head in dusgust, and throws the previously-filled cube of 'energon' away. "Bah! It's just /fool's energon/." He says. After a few quick messeges over the radio, Hook takes to the air. After giving his fellow Decepticons time to avoid the shimmering, energon-like substance and the technocows, Hook takes out his plasma pistol. He levels it at the pooled and trampled turbosteer waste, and fires off several bolts of super-heated plasma, hoping to IGNITE the whole mess! Thunderwing says, "Even when they are the mass-produced armor that clothes our legions on the road to conquest." Redshift says, "Blue, this is why we can't have nice things." "Yes Prime, that is right!" roars the shell as it ripples at the attacks, staggering back somewhat. "Your oldest and deadliest enemy! Fight me, or let this pathetic human city be trampled to the ground. Oh, the life of the pathetic Autobots, forever destroyed by choices! But Decepticons... Decepticons are /electric!/" His shell crackles with electricity and a charge arcs out towards the Autobot leader. And then the beastly head turns to the Reptilian armour. "Don't just stand there, fool, DO SOMETHING!" You strike Rodimus Prime with electricity. Thunderwing says, "Perhaps, Catechism. I should hope that you are not so WORTHLESS as your comrades in the role of test pilot." Breakdown pushes his speed to the limit, but these are not earthly steers. "haaa, for the love of primus.. He slam on his breaks & performs a textbook 180 degree turn, heading back towards the rather ugly Octopoid armor. "Maybe I'll have better luck annoying the Autobots.." He says just before he goes flying over a dirt ramp and through the air "What the!" On his way down, strafe comes into view, and Breakdown reeves his engine, spinning his wheels in the air and trying to aim for the Technobot. Breakdown strikes Strafe with ram. Blueshift says, "Pfft. Check the recordings, I am doing excellently against Prime" Galvatron says, "Now...who is doing /what/ to our precious weapons? Someone! Report!" Blueshift says, "It is Octane who is blind" Blueshift says, "I am battling Prime in glorious one to one combat, sire" The turbosteers rear as Grimlock throws up his wall of flames, causing a miles-long robot cow pile-up. They begin to turn, ponderously, seeking to escape the fire... but there's fire BEHIND them now, too! The Fool's Energon, much like Earth cow manure, BURSTS into a RAGING INFERNO! The turbosteers begin to panic, trampling everything in their way as they mill about, screaming in fear. Galvatron says, "And is my otherwise-incompetant counterpart proving useful for once, Blueshift? Do you yet function?" Springer manages to throw himself to one side, out of the way of the Reptillian armor. "Whoa! Keep trying Octane...I think you're getting the hang of that thing!" He sticks out his sword to let one of the sharpened edges it drag along the side of Octane's armor as it goes flying by. Springer strikes Reptilian Armor with Blade. Blueshift says, "Yes my lord! The Autobot is hurt, do you have orders for me?" Not even noticing that his weapons fire hasn't hit a single thing -- it rarely does -- Strafe's attention is instead taken away by Grimlock's bellowing orders. "Wha-- AAH! H-hey! I said lay off, w-w-weirdo!" Strafe lances out a foot to kick Catechism in the stomach and knock her away. At the same time, he pivots on his other heel, making a break towards the steers. "G-got it, Grimlock! I just h-hope I don't hit them--GAH!" Just as he finishes speaking, the Technobot is rammed, apparently double-teamed now as he goes sprawling through the air, striking the earth with a solid -whud-. "O-oh man... this isn't good..." Strafe misses Catechism with his GAAAAAAAAAH!! attack. Galvatron says, "I must assume that you are using one of our prototypes. If this is true, then yes. Your order is to return it in one useable piece. Your status upon return is negotiable." Blueshift says, "As always sire, I live to serve. I imagine combat readings against that cur Prime will prove most enlightening!" Scrapper says, "We're doing alright, Lord Galvatron, but there's a lot of high powered Autobots here. It's definitely a good test for the shells." Metal T-Rex shoots fire and fire and fire. "Me not know how long me keep this up for!" A cow dashes through the wall of flame towards Grimlock. He spins quickly and nails the cow with his tail, sending it hurling back into the herd. He quickly resumes the flamewall. "AUTOBOTS BETTER COME UP WITH SOMETHING! This holding action not work too much more!" Scattershot is slammed back to the ground by Scrapper's blast. He skids back a few feet, but quickly regains his footing. There is rage in his optics. "That HURT, ya slaggin' tonkabot!" he roars, shaking a fist. He turns briefly as Strafe cries out, and cups his hands around his mouth. "Hang in there, Strafe! Yer a trooper!" Scattershot then returns his attention to Scrapper, firing off a blast from his shoulder cannons. Zip. BZARK. Scattershot misses Scrapper with his Shoulder Blasters attack. Galvatron says, "Thank you for a pertinent, if delayed, report, Scrapper. Is my presence required, or is Blueshift...actually holding his own?" Scrapper hesitates, "I'm sure he can find a way to screw it up, Lord Galvatron." Galvatron says, "I do not doubt that, Scrapper. I do not doubt that." Rodimus Prime spasms and twists on the ground as electricity arcs over his body, his skeletal inner support structure briefly visible somehow through his armor as he flails on the ground. "Arrgh!" He grunts in pain, smoke curling from his armor, his fingers spasming and dropping his pistol. Once the electricity starts to abate, though, he struggles to his feet with sheer force of will -- pushing forward towards the Pretender Armor even as it ravages his boyish good looks. "How's this for SOMETHING, Decepticon?" He yells, slashing his buzzsaw hand at one of the walking Octopus' tentacles. Rodimus Prime strikes you with Buzzsaw for 13 points of damage. Galvatron says, "The question remains, Scrapper. Are things under control? I am a busy Emperor, but I am sure I could spare a moment to cannon Prime into oblivion." Galvatron says, "Perhaps twice." Blueshift says, "Sire, your brave and wise cannon is always welcome" Warmonger says, "HAIL GALVATRON" Thunderwing says, "Galvatron, may I suggest to let things run their course? Your... mighty... presence may taint the data that has been recorded so far." The herd of steers draws closer and closer to the toothily smiling puma. Suddenly the momentum of the steers turns chaotic with fire fore and aft and they start scrambling! Quickswitch crouches and releases forward. His claws scatter stones and cut across the ground as he speeds toward the rampaging herd of electro-steers. he doesn't even know how they got there, nor cares, only that they look /delicious/... something to sink his teeth into. A hiss as wing-thrusters go off, extending his leap over the fire. One of the ones on the edge of the herd will be /perfect.../ He reaches out with sharp, extended claws, issuing with a *shink* of metal, like swords being drawn. Suddenly the steers are face to face with a natural predator of Cybertron. Scrapper says, "You are of course welcome, Lord Galvatron." Scrapper raises his pistol to an upright position, savoring the sight of Scattershot getting slammed to the ground. Unfortunately, Scattershot gets back up again, and the Constructicon is forced to take rapid action. Shifting to the side, the shoulder cannon blast rips past him and slams into the dirt back by one of the trenches he dug. The Constructicon scowls inwardly. Figured his work was going to get scuffed up. As Octane seems to have Springer to worry about as well, Scrapper is unwilling to move in against the Technobot to use his great strength against him. Best to stick with the laserfire where it's somewhat safer. Taking aim even as he jogs away from the now burning waste that Hook lit up, Scrapper tries to blow that shoulder cannon right off. Scrapper strikes Scattershot with Laser Pistol - Low Setting. Commander Soundwave says, "Thunderwing mocks your abilities, Lord. Clearly he believes that his bio-suits are superior to you. I recommend disciplinary action." With the useless turbosteer crap destroyed, and giving the autobots /another/ problem to deal with, Hook turns his attention to Scrapper. Unsure whether Scrapper can take care of one of his Autobot counterparts alone(The Technobots do have a certain reputation for fierceness). Hook closes in on Scattershot, and fires off a few quick shots at his undefended rear. Hook strikes Scattershot with disruptor. Blueshift says, "So if the creatures are not producing energon why are we fighting over them?" Outburst says, "The ever-cautious and... ever-wise Soundwave mistakes Thunderwing's intentions. Surely a scientist such as yourself can understand the importance of an experiment, yes? The mighty intellect of Soundwave should surely recognize caution over arrogance." Breakdown flips in the air after hitting Strafe, and lands on the roof of his car mode. "What the" He quickly transforms, shaking his head and then pulling out his gun. He sneers at the autobot in front of him. "I'll teach you to get it my way Tecnho-butt!" Raising his arm and suddenly shfiting to his right, he fires at strafe. Breakdown strikes Strafe with disruptor. Thunderwing says, "Soundwave has clearly allowed his role as a sycophant to overshadow his role as a scientist, Outburst. Heed him no thought." Scrapper says, "I can't speak for the others, Blueshift, but *I'm* fighting because I like shooting Scattershot!" Commander Soundwave says, "Insolence!" Thunderwing says, "Blueshift -- WHY you fight the Autobots is of no consequence to me. You are collecting valuable data for the Decepticon Empire." Galvatron says, "Silence! I did not ask if I was welcome, I asked if I was needed! Galvatron does not ask permission to join battles. Galvatron asks permission for nothing! Now, about Thunderwing." Galvatron says, "If it is deemed necessary for the experiment that I remain here, then so be it. I want this experiment to succeed, so that our...next project might be as grand as I have planned it to be!" Thunderwing says, "Galvatron -- I have no doubt you would crush Rodimus Prime if you were to arrive. Let us see how far the Shell can whittle down the Autobots' 'Chosen One'." Blueshift's response to Prime is to have all the tentacles shiver as he steps back, growling and roaring in gutteral animal rage. "Priiiiiiiime!" he cries, the huge beast clenching and unclenching its hands, the face a rictus of total evil and rage. "Priiiiiime! I will gut you and take the Matrix for my leader, Galvatron! Hail the Decepticon Empire! We are strength, you are weakness. You are superior to us in only one way - you DIE easier!" And with that, he rescues his trident from the ground and once more, lunges at Prime with it! Rodimus Prime evades your FORK'D attack. Galvatron says, "Then let it be so. Blueshift..if your shell is in danger of being compromised, I expect a hasty retreat. Do not make me come and save you." Thunderwing says, "Thank you, my lord." Galvatron says, "This experiment had better go according to plan, Thunderwing. If I find I have missed an opportunity to erase a weakened Prime only to gain nothing, I shall demote you to Target Practice." Thunderwing says, "Galvatron, the dividends of this project will be beyond even your imperial imagination." Blitzwing says, "I don't know, he can imagine quite a bit." Galvatron says, "I expect nothing less." Galvatron says, "My imagination, like my power, is limitless." Thunderwing says, "See, how even our most pathetic soldiers such as Blueshift and Octane are able to hold their own against the Autobots' -most powerful-." From Reptilian Armor , Octane is scratched alongside the length of his armor as he flies by, landing in the dirt and scraping his way along like a baseball player trying to make it home, before he comes to a stop. He gets to his feet, swaying slightly, before he turns around and points a slightly waving finger at Springer. Apparently he's a little dizzy as he speaks to Springer. "That's it...you're going to be on the ground now." He rushes at him, mouth opening wide, before he tries to attach his teeth to Springer's shoulder. Catechism comments, "I'm kind of a Decepticon. I obey the empire, not scared little Autobots." And then she tries to get out of the way of Strafe's attack. She's really not hitting worth pbeans today, is she? She tries to nail Strafe with a low-powered arm laser shot. Catechism strikes Strafe with disruptor. Reptilian Armor misses Springer with its Snap! attack. Blitzwing says, "Octane? Octane is kicking bumpers? This I have to see." Galvatron says, "And you are positive that they can learn nothing of our..toys by engaging them? The last thing I want is to find that damnable DepthCharge or Perceptor tinkering with their own versions." Octane says, "No, really, Blitz, I'll tell you all about it later so you can stay right where you are thanks." "Wh-what are you talking about? I didn't get in your way, you -- agh, s-stop that! -- f-freakin' idiot!" Whatever Breakdown fired at Strafe pings off the Technobot's armor, as does the laser shots of Catechism, sending him staggering back a few steps, armor sparking. "DOUBLE-TEAMED! O-OH NO!! THIS IS B-BAAAAAAD!!" As Strafe staggers, he begins to fire round after round of high-powered heat blasts at both Breakdown and Catechism, seeking to pelt both of them in a wide-spread onslaught of firepower. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH JESUS!!" Strafe unleashes his FREAKIN' OUT!!!! attack on Catechism and Breakdown, striking no one. MiG-25 "Foxbat" appears over the horizon on full military power, not willing to miss out on Octane being a terrifying war machine for like the first time ever. The Turbosteers continue to panic, running in circles in the perimeter of the flames. When Grimlock snaps, they scream and stumble back. When Quickswitch strikes, they dump more Fool's Energon out of pure fear. They aren't going anywhere for now... but they're also on fire. It's only a matter of time before they figure out that a gigantic, flaming turbosteer is quite a deadly weapon indeed. Thunderwing says, "Hmmm. It is... Impossible... to say that they will learn *nothing*. But they are INCOMPETENTS compared to my intellect." Thunderwing says, "It would take them generations to reverse engineer my brilliance." Springer's optics widen just for a moment in a brief expression of alarm, but he manages to lean back enough to let Octane's attack close on empty air just in front of Springer's face. Springer quickly crouches slightly to get beneath the armored suit's still extended jaws, then explodes upwards, channeling the motion into a rising punch at the Reptillian suit's chin. Springer misses Reptilian Armor with his uppercut attack. Thunderwing says, "By that time, Pretender Decepticons will be trampling the entire Galaxy to dust." Galvatron says, "Again, Thunderwing. My approval lasts so long as you prove correct." Thunderwing says, "Of course, Galvatron. Of course." "AGH! My SKIDPLATE!" Scattershot complains as Hook blasts him in the ro-butt. "Now that's fightin' dirty!" he exclaims. Then, a moment later: "I LIKE that in a mech!" But, like Ultra Magnus, he doesn't have TIME for that now! The Technobot commander turns back to Scrapper, drawing his rifle and firing a volley of acid pellets towards the Constructicon. "Eat meltin' balls, Scrapper!" he hollers. Scattershot strikes Scrapper with Automatic Acid-Pellet Rifle. Metal T-Rex's flame suddenly... sputters out. "UH OH. Me have... slight... problem..." The wall of flame dies down and a cloud of angry cows stares at Grimlock through the suddenly open way forward. Rodimus Prime sidesteps to avoid the broken trident lunging at him -- even distracted by the impending Turbosteer Disaster, it seems he has enough fleet-footedness to avoid the occasional attack. "You're going to eat your words when I crack this thing wide open, Blueshift," Rodimus castigates, jumping up over the Octopoid's neck only to bring his elbow right back down on it. Rodimus Prime strikes you with ElbowDrop for 8 points of damage. Assault Beast lands on one of the steer's backs, solidly coming into contact and digging his claws into it. Giving over to the beast in his nature was something that always felt good, and felt free. A harsh metallic *rend* is where the fangs come into contact with thick, armored neck and try tearing and penetrating into it with a muffled growl. The steer wails and struggles, swings its huge bull-head wildly as it tries to disengage the hungry puma. The other steers spill even more fluid in a panic as the turbo-predator cuts one from the herd. "Come on, Hook, we've almost got this guy!" Scrapper calls out, practically gleeful as the two Constructicons gang up on the lone Technobot. This kind of odds are the kind of odds that Scrapper can get behind. Finally summoning up his courage to charge in towards the scary Autobot, Scrapper runs right into a spray of acidic pellets. More than a few hit his armour, spraying acid across his chest and arms. Some of the acid even gets through the blaster holes Scattershot made earlier. Grunting in pain, Scrapper manages to endure it nonetheless. When you bunk with Mixmaster, you get used to getting burned with acid. The Constructicon is almost in melee range now, but fires off one more series of laser blasts before doing so. Hopefully Hook is there to back him up. Scrapper strikes Scattershot with Laser Pistol - Medium Setting. From Reptilian Armor , Octane moves his head back quickly at Springer's uppercut, dodging the upward punch, before he moves forward again as he draws his right arm back before curling it under him to thrust it toward Springer's stomach. "Ha ha, Autobot! Guess you're not perfect after all!" Reptilian Armor misses Springer with its Punch attack. MiG-25 "Foxbat" closes in on Octane rapidly, streaking down out of the sky towards him (in the lizard armor) and Springer. "How you doing in there, Octane? Having a good time?" asks Blitzwing as he strafes the big green Triplechanger, 20mm shells raking across the ground in parallel lines towards Springer. Blitzwing strikes Springer with 20mm Autocannon. Blueshiftpunch staggers back from Prime, internal warnings telling him that his energon is dangerously low. But... he is a warrior! And this is Prime! "One shall stand, one shall fall, Prime!" he cries. "I will crack the Matrix open and drink the sweet energon inside!" Does... does Blueshift just think the Matrix is full of energon? Maybe? Whatever, the huge octopoid creature roars, and with one last lunge, throws forwards its tentacles at the Autobot leader You strike Rodimus Prime with Octo-CRUSH!. Hook isn't surprised to see that Scattershot has put his focus on Scrapper. Everyone seems to forget that /Hook/ is the head of Devastator. Of course, he's not going to let the Tencobot commander take Scrapper apart, it would just be more work for Hook to pu him back together again... And doulbe-teaming Scattershot should prove to be an amusing diversion from his many otherwise boring duties. Hook lets out a line of his cable, with his prominant, namesake hook at the end, and tries to entangle Scattershot's arm and weapon with the cable, as well as sink the hook into Scat's arm. Hook strikes Scattershot with Hook, Line, and Sinker. Autobot Shuttle descends from the skies above. Autobot Shuttle has arrived. Breakdown watches the flash of light as Strafe fires back at him, moving his arm up to shield him..but nothing hits him. "What the hell...." He stands there looking himself over, and after finding no holes, transforms into his car mode, revving his engine and cranking Ratt's Round and Round as he begins driving in circles around Strafe, tilting the large cannon over his car mode in Strafe's direction and firing shot after shot. Breakdown strikes Strafe with its special attack. Autobot Shuttle comes zooming in from above, orangeness gleaming in the desert sun. Rodimus Prime is hammered into the ground once more by slimey Pretender tentacles, the Autobot leader definitely starting to look battered and worse for wear from the non-stop genetic super-monster assault. "Not today, Decepticon!" He quips back, ever defiant, aiming all six of his wrist barrels at the monster's face and unleashing an assault of electrical charges at its face. Rodimus Prime strikes you with Photon Eliminator Hose-Down for 7 points of damage. Springer expression shows no concern at all, instead displaying smugly (over-)confident smirk as Octane takes the fight into a realm where Springer -really- shines...and that is the realm of talking trash. "Ooooctane...this new armor isn't really working out for you, is it? I mean, yeah it makes you even uglier than you were before, but it's not making you any better in a fight." Just then he hears a disturbingly familiar sound - a Decepticon jet on a strafing run. He shudders and jerks spasmodically as the cannon rounds rain down on him. When the smoke and dust clears, he has rows of holes scorched in his previously untouched armor. "Oh, great." He raises his rifle one-handed and fires a few desultory lasers after Blitzwing. Springer misses MiG-25 "Foxbat" with his laser attack. The Turbosteers continue to mill around for a moment, not quite trusting that the fire is GONE... but they figure it out quickly enough, for space cows. They large, docile eyes transform to large, RAGE-FILLED eyes! "MNMNMNMMMMMOOOOOOOO!" roars the lead bull, charging at Grimlock. As the Turbosteer under Quickswitch twitches its last and falls, a crowd of rabid robot cows descend on the sixchanger, all hooves, horns and flying waste product. A good third of the Turbosteers start to move again... but slowly. There might still be time to catch them! The Alpha Trion comes to a hover high above the battle over robo-cows. It's lower cargo doors open and a grouping of barred cages drop from it's belly. Hovering done and cargo delivered, the shuttle's thrusters ignite and it begins to move towards the outskirts of the battle. "Hang tight... buckaroo's" says Silverbolt as he brings the shuttle in for a landing. Metal T-Rex jumps back as the cows surge forward. He rapidly transforms to robot mode and fires a rock at the ground in front of the cow wave. "Maybe that hold them off for little bit..." Shooting wildly and hitting nothing, Strafe is unfortunately an open target to Breakdown's counter-assault. "B-BACK OFF! --H-hey, did I get 'em? ..." Strafe peeks up, scanning around... just in time for that cannonfire to strike him solidly, with a debilitating series of jolts that don't damage, but hold him completely still -- much to the twitchy Technobot's dismay. "OH P-PRIMUS I DIDN'T! I'M D-DOOMED! THEY'RE GONNA SLAG ME FOR SURE NOW! GAAAAAAH!" And he'll just continue on and on like this as he struggles vainly against the confines of Breakdown's assault. From Autobot Shuttle , Slingshot continues to hold on tight, because flying inside something isn't as much fun as flying on your own. Seriously. From Autobot Shuttle , Silverbolt looks back over his shoulder, "Slingshot. Play aerial herder. And don't get shot. Aft cargo hatch opening in 5." Scattershot drops his rifle back into subspace, reflexes completely shot from all the damage he's sustained. He's moving slowly, leaking everywhere and trailing smoke with every move. Only half of his optic visor is lit, and that sporadically. "Yer... yer gonna have t'do better'n... THAT!" he croaks, staggering a few steps towards the Constructicon commander. Just then, Hook's... hook... latches into his arm, dragging the Technobot backwards through the dusty earth. He pauses, cerebrocron working overtime, smoke literally rising from his head. He's deep in the berserker rage now. "Hrrr... hrrr... hrrr... HRRRRRRN!" he roars, sounding more beast than bot. There's a certain madness burning in his flickering optic as he looks back at Hook, fuel leaking from his mouth like rabid slobber. A feral rictus creeps across his face as he reaches BACK and GRABS the line... then starts to PULL Hook. Harder and harder he pulls, then he LASHES the chain, whipping Hook up into the air, and begins to... spin Hook around, like a flail. Moments later, he turns his raging optic back to Scrapper... and slashes his arm forward, dragging the Hook-flail with it. "HHRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Scattershot strikes Scrapper with Hook, Line, and STINKER!. From Autobot Shuttle , Slingshot moves his aft to that cargo hatch, and transforms, prepared for herding duties. "Gottcha boss. They won't lay a shot on me." Assault Beast disengages himself from the struggling, paniced turbo-steer with a feline chuff of deep reluctance--long enough for the enraged turbo-crowd to trample toward him. His feline eyes grow wide as the combined might of prey descends upon him. The puma's mouth curls threateningly. He is also a jet and, as the spray of rocks and hooves and ener-dung comes closer, he sprints into the opposite direction, hoping to gain enough momentum for jet mode to contain those creatures from the air.... MiG-25 "Foxbat" tears past Springer in a roar of jet engines, barrel-rolling through his laserfire and emerging untouched. He transforms in midair, spinning into a hover and snapping off several shots from his carbine at the big green guy. "Octane not measuring up, Springer? Hey Octane, you know last time I drove that thing I knocked the bolts out of Snarl? You're gonna set a bad example!" Blitzwing strikes Springer with Gyro-Blaster Rifle (single). Blueshift says, "Bah, I am out of Energon! Octane, Prime is nearly dead, finish him off!" Blitzwing says, "Yeah, 'finish him off,' Octane, I gotcha covered with Springer, heh heh." From Autobot Shuttle , Andi Lassiter stays with the medtechs and the shuttle, as there's little to nothing she can do in this....very bizarre situation. She does, however, keep in contact with Foxfire, to help him try to herd the stampede toward the hastily dropped corrals. From Autobot Shuttle , Silverbolt watches as Slingshot takes off out the back hatch. Looking over to Andi, he raises an optic ridge. "Can you handle landing this thing on semi-auto pilot, or do I need to take you with me?" Dreadwind says, "I don't know why i bother, but why don't you just refuel?" From Autobot Shuttle , Andi Lassiter says, "Uh....I can't even reach the controls." Blitzwing says, "He can't refuel because Octane is the refueller and he's in the lizard suit, duh." Scrapper is enjoying this now. They have the Technobot right where they want him. He's outnumbered, outgunned, and horribly wounded. "If you insist," he sneers in his gruff voice, indeed preparing to do worse to the Autobot berserker. "Give it up, Scattershot! You've lost and we've won. It's over... finished!" The engineer holsters his weapon and clenches his lime green fists, ready to beat the injured mech into submission. But then Scattershot gets one of those wild looks in his eyes. Scrapper ignores it. With the injuries he's suffered he need not worry. But then Scattershot starts slobbering, and he grabs the line and /yanks/ Hook off his feet. "Wha-?" Scrapper stammers, taking a running leap at the Technobot to finish him off. The sound of armour smashing against armour can be heard from kilometres around as Hook is used as a flail against Scrapper, slamming the Constructicon to the ground and tearing through his ultra-thick armour. Satisfaction for Hook is short-lived. The Constructicon struggles to hold on to his line and his precious hook, against the much larger Scattershot. Hook digs his feet into the ground, but the rocks give him little purchase with which to push against. Then, suddenly, Hook is /airborne/, and being swung around by his hook and cable, an absolutly priceless look of surprise on his face. "WAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAaaaAAAAAAAAA!" His voice oscillating as he swings closer, then away, from Scrapper. Then, with a thunderous impact, he is swung into his fellow Constricticon, sending a yelp of surprise from Hook. The monsterous creature that has let itself become known as Blueshift roars as it shudders, a full jolt of electrical energy to the face. "Nnnn" he screams in rage, tentacles and hands clawing at the face in pain. "Nnnnn you are lucky Prime, my power banks are depleted. But rest assured that next we meet, the Matrix will be MINE! The BLUESHIFT MATRIX!" He shakes his fist, and four of his tentacles at Prime, before boosters in the feet kick into life, lifting to suit vertically into the air. "TILL NEXT WE MEET!" Octopoid Armor begins retreating, leaving itself vulnerable to parting shots from AV-8B Harrier II , Autobot Shuttle , Assault Beast , Breakdown, Reptilian Armor . Breakdown laughs as Strafe is paralyzed and speeds off towards the Constructicons and Strafe's leader. Coming up on what seems to be a circus show, Breakdown speeds up, turning and aiming for Scattershot's feet Breakdown strikes Scattershot with ram. Scattershot falls to the ground unconscious. Dreadwind says, "Oh great so they're already malfunctioning and he can't get out." From Reptilian Armor , Octane turns to shake his fist at Springer as the rounds of trash talk fly toward him, striking deeper then any bullets has so far, before he starts to twist his head around for a target to attack. He sees the shuttle come down before coming into a hover before flying upward toward it to just use his body to slam into it's front canopy. Reptilian Armor strikes Autobot Shuttle with Mighty Tackle. Thunderwing says, "Dreadwind, silence yourself." Thunderwing says, "Blueshift: My readings indicate that you are not lying... this time. The data you have gathered has been... satisfactory." Blueshift says, "Thank you sir!" Outburst says, "The prattling of incompetents never ceases to amuse..." Commander Soundwave says, "I will expect you to forward that research data to me, Thunderwing, so as to insure you are not exaggerating results to Galvatron." Galvatron says, "And I will expect to receive this data myself. For reasons which begin and end with me being the Emperor, and that being all you need to worry yourself with." Thunderwing says, "Only on Galvatron's orders, Soundwave. I won't risk your mediocrity tainting the project otherwise." Geo says, "... mediocrity?" Geo says, "You... *CLANK! of Americon grabbing Geo's mouth*" Thunderwing says, "Of course, lord Galvatron..." Dreadwind says, "Oh well it's not like anyone ever listens to anything i have to say anyway." Thunderwing says, "Though it is rather... technical." Galvatron says, "The results will be forwarded to myself and Scrapper, unedited, Thunderwing. Soundwave, I am unsure as to their use to you...from what I hear, you have holes in our security that you should be patching." Foxfire has appeared on the scene, and is rushing toward the stampede. He glances toward the shuttle before picking up speed, barking at the angry turbocattle. He darts to one side of the herd, trying to drive them toward the fencing. It's a bit of a degrading job, but someone has to do it. And in the meantime, he hopes the Decepticons don't decide to make him a target. Blitzwing says, "Are you saying Galvatron's not gonna understand? He's a flippin' super genius if you forgot while you were away, Thunderwing." Commander Soundwave says, "...I will... mend those holes, Lord Galvatron." The Turbosteers flinch back from the aerial herding, doubling back on their tracks. Those going for Quickswitch mill about in enraged confusion, trying in vain to jump up and catch him. Being Turbosteers, though, they can't really jump. Grimlock's rocket causes the approaching bulls to recoil, pausing and reconsidering their charge. Watch out, though... they could make a break for it any minute! Metal T-Rex transforms back into dinosaur mode and dashes forward, aiming his head the cows like a battering ram. He roars deafeningly. "GET BACK DUMB COWS!" Galvatron says, "Good, Soundwave. I do not wish to hear Blaster's foul voice on our channels in the future." And that glorious Harrier jet just /sails/ out of the back of the shuttle, managing to (barely) get out of the way before Octane rams it. "Here cowy cowy cowy..." Slingshot calls, as he does that fancy wingtilt, and curves his flightpath to head towards the cattle threatening people. "Moo. Moo." What? How else do you get a cow's attention? Rodimus Prime gets up to his feet, his cracked faceplate smirking as he watches Blueshift fly off. "So much for Decepticon secret weapons, huh?" He turns his head to the side, spitting out a glob of energon and mechfluid. "Ngh. Hurts like the Mother of Primus, though," he grunts, gripping the wound in his abdomen which cackles with electricity. He falls over onto his side, wincing. Commander Soundwave says, "As you command, Lord! I shall update our encryption software to ensure secure communications." Dreadwind says, "It's bad enough listening to all the other cheery chatter let alone Blaster's annoyingly happy tones." Blueshift says, "And Sky Lynx. Sky Lynx doesn't even have HANDS, how does he hack our communications?" As the Alpha Trion is preping to thrust off to land, there is a sudden jolt as if it had hit a small moon or collided with an asteroid. Silverbolt works the controls like a pro, righting the shuttle from it's impact. But even a professional flier will drift when hit. As the shuttle moves off from it's former position, he Aerialbot flips the defensive computer into 'ACTIVE' mode and smiles. "Target that ugly thing and fire at will" he says as he opens the weapons pods. CLANNNNGGGGGG! Hook slams into Scrapper, and Scattershot literally howls in triumph. "GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" he howls, beating at his chest with his ruined arms. The hook jerks back and forth, still lodged in one of them. He is so busy howling and beating his chest that he almost doesn't notice Breakdown running up and DOINKing into his foot. Almost. Scattershot pauses and looks down, leaking and drooling fluids and smoke from every possible location on his body. His single working optic stares at the little Stunticon without even a flicker of comprehension. He sways, to and fro, to and fro. "Hnnnn?" he asks, mindlessly. Right before he falls over, right on top of Breakdown. THUMP. Thunderwing chuckles nervously. "Not at all, Blitzwing. But I'm sure -you- would not." Autobot Shuttle misses Reptilian Armor with its Dramatic, Timely, Precise Rocket Attack! attack. Blitzwing says, "Oh, well, yeah. Got me there." Assault Beast circles the steers, firing downward just at their stamping perimiter, a shot here and there to contain the electric cattle like laser electric prods to keep them as tightly together as possible, until the cages are ready, "Come on, guys!" He calls cheerfully, "Don't have all cycle!" He fires into the dirt and rocks again, ready to direct the creatures wherever needed. The Turbosteers rush one way, then the other, then back in the first direction. Amidst all the fighting and explosions on the battlefield, and the herding and explosions all around THEM, the robotic herd seems effectively contained... for now. From Autobot Shuttle , Andi Lassiter yelps in surprise and nearly drops her radio at the jolt of something hitting the shuttle, but then returns her concentration to helping Foxfire, not daring to move from her seat in the shuttle now. Springer stumbles back as Blitzwing blasts a fresh hole in his chest. Springer clutches at the wound, optics dimming briefly. "AHH!...Gyros...blasted..." One optic reactivates, then the other. Springer removes his hand to examine the small hole underneath. "That's it...?" He points his arm at Blitzwing, opening a tiny compartment in his forearm. Springer strikes Blitzwing with pop-up laser. "GONNA DIE OH JESUS THEY'VE GOT ME DEAD TO RIGHTS I--... ... what?" Strafe blinks as he looks up from his twitchingly secure hold as Breakdown just sort of drives away and Catechism is gone somewhere -- he doesn't know, and he doesn't care. It all means one, very important thing: "I-is this some sort of ambush?! BACK OFF!! OH--hey, I can m-move now!" Scrambling up onto his feet, the Technobot gets up just in time to see Scattershot fall over. ... Right on top of Breakdown. "O-OH JESUS! SCATTERSHOT'S BEEN KILLED! H-HELP! SOMEONE HELP, THEY K-KILLED SCATTERSHOT!!" As Strafe shrieks, he makes a break towards his commander, rushing over and attempting to grip him by the legs, to slowly drag him off Breakdown and towards the shuttle. "Nngh-- d-d-don't worry, Sc-scattershot. I'll see that you get a pr-proper... burial...! --GAH!" And Strafe will continue to make a very slow retreat with Scattershot in tow, pausing every now and then to shoot at nothing but air, as if assured a Decepticon was upon him. Strafe begins retreating, leaving himself vulnerable to parting shots from AV-8B Harrier II , Foxfire, Autobot Shuttle , Sub-Orbital Jet , Springer, Breakdown, Reptilian Armor , Octopoid Armor , Rodimus Prime, Catechism, Scattershot. As the turbosteers are herded towards the cages, a few rebel... but they seem to have given up for the most part. The waste product continues to coat the ground behind them, no longer burning now that the fire's been extinguished. Blitzwing shrugs. "They're not real high-caliber bullets. It's more about the quantity," he explains carefully, thumbing his carbine from semi-auto to full auto. "Lemme demonstrate," he adds, spinning to hose down everybody within his line of sight with a purple barrage! Blitzwing unleashes his Gyro-Blaster Rifle (full auto) attack on Rodimus Prime, Springer and Strafe, striking Springer, Rodimus Prime and Strafe. From Reptilian Armor , Octane uses his clawas to scale up the front of the shuttle, causing sequetinal holes to appear in the class, before he makes his way to the top of shuttle before turning himself around to face the front of the shuttle. Octane then starts backpeddling acrosss the top of the shuttle, dragging his claws through the steel, as he tries to peel the shuttle's top armor away like the top of a can of soup. Reptilian Armor strikes Autobot Shuttle with Blade. Scrapper claws his way out from underneath Hook. "Where is he?!" he shouts. "I'm going to turn him into scrap!" He staggers up to his feet, trying to find what has happened to the Technobot Commander. What he sees is Scattershot on the ground, defeated. He doesn't see Breakdown, as Scattershot is covering him up pretty good. The engineer raises his hands over his head, "Victory for the Constructicons!" He moves over to give Hook the secret Constructicon high-five handshake. Autobots meanwhile continue to draw closer and closer and the Alpha Trion cuts loose with its weapons against Octane. Worse, the Turbosteer are practically contained at this point. "Uh... not to draw the victory party to a close or anything, but... lets start the running away preparations..." Hook dusts himself off, and glances as Strafe drags away Scattorshot's inert body. He returns Scrapper's 'secret handshake' which probaly looked cooler when he made it up. "Yes, there's no need to risk ourselves anymore." He takes to the air, and slowly but surely flies away. . o O (Iwish I was a flying crane. How come Scrapper gets to fly around in his vehicle mode and I don't?) Hook begins retreating, leaving itself vulnerable to parting shots from AV-8B Harrier II , Foxfire, Autobot Shuttle , Blitzwing, Sub-Orbital Jet , Strafe, Springer, Breakdown, Reptilian Armor , Octopoid Armor , Rodimus Prime, Catechism, Scrapper, Scattershot, Metal T-Rex. Breakdown owwwfhhs as he is brought to a sudden stop as he hit's Scattershot, the large Technobot commander falling back on him. He spins his wheels in vain, not being able to move from the hefty autobot on his hood. Then he feels Scattershot moving..no..being dragged across his roof and hood, scratching his paint up even more. "Primus I hate the desert.. and where do you think YOU'RE GOING AUTOBOT!" he screams as Strafe drags/carries Scattershot off. "Yeah, you'd better run!" He transforms and keeps yelling at the two as he makes his way over to his constructicon comrades, Breakdown's components shift around until he finally changes into his robot mode. Sub-Orbital Jet weaves in the air, driving his own angry portion of the steers toward the cages, firing off lasers to either side of them with each weave in the air, "Springer! Turbosteak's on me!" he calls over the radio to the big green Triple Changer. Foxfire has continued barking, and even nipping at the heels of the turbosteers. As they begin to settle down, he relaxes somewhat, but he anxiously circles the pen to make sure none of them escape. He growls at them warningly. Springer's optic widen and he flings an arm in front of his face out of habit. He still gets knocked off of his feet by the new barrage. He pulls himself to his feet with a groan. "Yeah...I see your point Blitz." He points his own rifle at Blitzwing, but instead of the normal energy blast, he unleashes his trusty buy-myself-some-breathing room attack ™. Springer misses Blitzwing with his wind tunnel attack. Springer looks down at his rifle accusingly. "I believed in you!" The Turbosteers are finally herded into the cage by the combined efforts of the Autobots (and Breakdown). The gate slams shut, and the crisis is averted. Now, all that's left is the battle... and cleaning up the miles-long trail of Fool's Energon. Inside the cage, the turbosteers mill around, quickly calming down now that they're back in an enclosed environment. Most of them put down their heads and begin to graze, chewing up tussocks of tough grass, dirt, rocks and mud as if the dusty ground was made of the finest space caviar. "MOOOooOOOOooOOOOO!" they cry, in approval. Rodimus Prime starts to struggle back up to his feet only to be pegged in the back by a stray bullet from Blitzwing's burst. "Ow!" He yelps, despite himself, rubbing the dent in his back as he glares around. "Why are the Decepticons still here? Don't they realize there's nothing to fight over besides a pile of cow mess?" He bends over gingerly, scooping up his dropped pistol and aiming at Blitzwing, firing off a not-so-ginger shot at the triplechanger. "Vamoos, ya varmint!" Rodimus Prime strikes Blitzwing with Standard-Issue Autobot Laser Pistol. Scattershot is dragged along behind Strafe, emitting the occasional groan and trailing fuel. The Alpha Trion has humans, so a quick jump into space with hull breaches is a bad thing. But humans can handle some fast flying. Silverbolt puts the shuttle's nose up in the sky, thrusters pointing at the ground. He slides the thruster control forward in a quick movement that puts the shuttle into the sky in the blink of an eye. "Hold on back there" he growls as he does his best to get their hitchhiker off as fast as possible.